I have seen the robots in disguise, in 3

I hated Transformers part 2. I could not stand it, I mocked it for months. Everything about the movie was awful. I was not alone in my feelings, I had 2 seats for part 3 but I came alone because no one wanted to see it. It was as if I was giving away herpes, wife, “no way” brother, “I’ll pass” stranger, “ewww perv”. I tried not to go alone but, like most things in life trying did not mean shit.

Let me tell you right off the bat the theater experience was not good, due to a technical problem. I was alone in a dark theater for over an hour. I felt dirty, really dirty. Plus it felt like a sauna in there. When the movie started I was tired and ready to go home. The first 5 minutes did not help. It was just a slow recap of everything that was in every trailer then, boom life in the form of Rosie Huntington’s 3D ass. WOWSA that is how you do 3D. It was nearly has good as real life, Michael Bay has made the best 3D movie I have ever seen, not just for the hotties. The movie is never murky nor is it blurred, yes that’s right a Michael Bay 3D movie is not blurry. I can’t believe it either his regular movies are blurry as shit. I really want more good 3D movies. Green Lantern, Pirates of the Caribbean on Stranger Tides, Tron Legacy and Thor really made me think 3D sucks. Now I know it just has to be a real priority and not an afterthought.

The movie itself is so much better too. It’s not just the 3D that is great, it’s the action. The fights really come alive this time. I think Bay slowed it down because of the 3D, but in doing so he added so much life back into them. They just feel so much more emotional being that bit slower, if only he would of sped up the pacing. Bay made a nearly 2 hour movie and stretched it to nearly 3, its just way to bloated. I still don’t know what John Malkovich’s character was doing in the movie. His character is the definition of unnecessary. There are a lot of characters like that in this movie but none are given much screen time, which really helps forget about part 2.

The plot revolves around Shia LaBeouf’s character Sam trying to get a job and keep up with his new girl, Carly played by the super-hot, Rosie Huntington. Sam was dumped by Mikaela.  Why? Because, apparently she was a selfish bitch. That’s the whole story on that. At least according to everyone in the movie even the autobots. Now I am not a Megan Fox fan but she was missed in this outing. Rosie just feels lacking, she is hot but, that’s all she is. Just hot. Like I mentioned earlier there are lots of annoying characters, their screen time is just extremely short. The worst part of Transformers Dark of the Moon is that it feels just like the first no better even the story is the same. Hell Bumblebee still can’t talk and everyone acts like it’s the norm. The 3D is the real selling point here and not just for Rosie Huntington’s hot body.